Drip

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I skipped a day but I’m here now, okay lol. This song literally just dropped like 30 minutes ago and I’m already writing about it lol. I was hella anxious to listen to it though because Luke James hasn’t dropped anything in 3 years plus I am a huge fan (he’s my celebrity crush lmao). But in the song there’s this one line that says “deal with your emotion” and it sparked something in me. Sometimes I feel like I have a hard time coming to terms with my emotions and how I feel about certain things. I always feel like I have to stay strong which implies that I can’t cry at all. But, the rare times that I do actually try and think/feel through my emotions about certain situations, I always end up having a breakdown. I have no idea why I make it so difficult for myself to feel. It could have something to do with my sign. Virgos are known to be cold, emotionless, and calculated people. It could also be that the people around me never cry. I’ve literally only seen my mom legit cry like 2 times in my whole life. This stems from the stigma that black women are to be strong beings and carry everything on their shoulders (especially in my mom’s case because she was a single parent). And it seems like whenever we show a little vulnerability, we are seen as weak. I guess I don’t wanna be seen as weak so I try not to cry about my various situations. Due to this though, I am more prone to big breakdowns or blowups. The overall moral of the story is to talk to someone/something (maybe you have a wordpress like me) and get that shit off your chest. It’s okay if you have to cry a little…everybody cries. Don’t worry about how other people see you, just know that you have to be mentally stable and healthy in order to be the best version of you. I’m gonna take these tips and use them in my life as well…because me being worried about other people’s opinions is just my anxiety talking, right?

-AH

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Author: soundtrackofmyanxiety

adriana | 20 | MD & NJ | Just a girl with anxiety trying to find a way to her dreams

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